The Worst Christmas Gifts Ever

Posted by Andrea on December 10th, 2009. Filed under: Humor, christmas, gift, gift idea, gifts, holiday.

Dear Santa, do not bring these gifts to my house or you and I are done.

FOR HER
Peter Petrie Egg Separator
The yolk stays in the head, while the egg white drips from Peter’s nostrils. Great for making holiday meringue!

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Yoga Toes
I would rather have a bunionectomy.

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Silicone Pop-up Booty Enhancer
And, the tagline for the company, which produces this fine product is “Our Duty is Your Booty”. Genius.

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White Trash Cooking I & II
Although Twinkie Pie sounds tempting, I’ll pass.

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FOR HIM
Adult Footie Pajamas
No one over the age of 7 should ever wear footie pajamas. This guy looks like a complete tool, btw.

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The Potty Putter
When they run out of things to read…

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Razorba Back Shaver
I wonder if they make an extended handle so you can shave your butt? (Why did they have this guy pose with his shirt on? And, what’s with the table? Is it there to catch falling back hair?)

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FOR THE KIDS
Cat-a-pult Cat Hurler
You gotta be on sick bastard to own one of these. I don’t even like cats and I think this is just wrong.

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Pole Dancing Doll
After seeing this, one friend of mine asked if it came with  drunk Ken doll waving a wad of $20’s. I thought that comment was pretty freakin’ hilarious.

Because these are exactly the types of toys our children should play with.

White Trash Barbie
This is so wrong that I almost didn’t post it. I wonder if she and pole dancing dolly are BFFs?

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Decapitated Teddy Bear Lamp
Especially good for kids who suffer from frequent nightmares.

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FOR THE DOG
Snuggie for Dogs
Um, okay. No.

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10 Responses to The Worst Christmas Gifts Ever

  1. Kristen

    Hilarious. I might like the back shaver best. I wonder about the extension accessory or if they just go between the legs from to get the butt. Where to put table, then?

  2. Christi

    My mother gave me the Peter Petrie Egg Separator one year precisely because it was so disgusting! Thanks Mom!

  3. SizeTracker

    This is hilarious! Though, I have to say, that the footie pajamas might actually be OK if they were a little more subdued.

  4. Priscilla

    Where do you find this stuff? LOL : D Thanks for sharing.

  5. uberVU - social comments

    Social comments and analytics for this post…

    This post was mentioned on Twitter by hipmomswhowork: Dear Santa, If you bring me any of these gifts we’re done. http://bit.ly/81jCYb...

  6. MommaKiss

    Oh. My. GAWD.

  7. Jamie
  8. Suz Broughton

    I think you should add the Man Bag for men, besides that, great list :)

  9. cafay1

    Very funny. That egg thing is truely disgusting. But, I do know someone that I would give that to. :) Great Post.

  10. Color4Charlotte

    Wow – I have a lot of gift to return . . . . only kidding! This post is too funny! Love it –
    Donna

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